HIJRAH LOVE
The breaking of my heart

Farewell must come again in my relationship with Yulian. Where in the conversation between Yulian and the project owner in Surabaya has asked Yulian to return there immediately. So that morning also Yulian had to leave back to Surabaya even though only yesterday he had arrived home. And slowly the days will feel lonely when papa Adhi and Yulian leave this cheap house.

"Come on, take care of your health at home! Because you are a mother who must be strong in both your body and body. And take good care of your children, Papa will definitely miss you all!"

"God willing, Pa. Aisha would try to take care of the children of Aisha as much as Aisha could. Papa be careful on the road and don't forget to take care of his health!"

Papa Adhi eventually had to return to the city of Jakarta to carry out his duties there as a businessman. And now the two men I love are saying goodbye to each other to go to their respective destination cities. A moment of unwillingness has passed through my mind, but this is the destiny that must happen and must be lived as a servant in the name of the all-powerful God.

Not long after saying goodbye and kissing me, Yulian went with Papa Adhi to Kualanamu airport and was escorted by a driver who used to work at our house. After that, Ahtar and Arjuna said goodbye to their duties. Where Ahtar had to go to school and while Arjuna was in charge of becoming an obstetrician in a hospital that is quite famous in the city of Medan.

"Light, you be careful at home with Inem. Umi had to go to Aisyah Galery to continue her work there. If there's anything you can call Umi." I looked at him too.

"Good, Umi. Umi be careful on the way!"

"Yes already, Umi left first. Assalamu'alaikum." I stepped away.

"Getishalight." The light looked at me as I turned my body.

After all had gone and done their respective duties, for a moment my heart felt relieved. Because no one will ever know what I am currently experiencing, the worry and uneasiness that clashed into one. Even Light did not suspect me if, I was lying to him. Although I know honesty is very important in a principle of life, but I think right now honesty should I close the meeting to be a secret.

I drove my car at high speed, because I wanted to get there soon. The hospital I am currently heading to is Columbia Asia Medan Hospital. The public hospital in Medan city, which has several advanced tools in the process of handling patients. And a few hours later I finally got there, then immediately I parked my car neatly like any other car.

I slowly moved my foot towards the main door of the hospital. However, my feet immediately stopped and seemed reluctant to continue a step. I'm so scared, if what I'm worried about has an illness happens in my life. Even I felt afraid that I would lose them all when the farewell for good had just happened. However, I realized that God willed and that everything that happened was above His power.

"Bismilahbornrahmanirrahim." Then I continued my steps back.

I crossed many aisles in this hospital until I stopped my steps right in front of the room of a doctor who was skilled in his field. And it just so happened that day I was the first patient to line up in the waiting room. So without waiting for long I quickly met the doctor who was about to check on me. After entering the room, my heart suddenly pounded like never before. My head felt so dizzy, it even felt like I was unable to endure this pain I felt in my head.

"Bruck!"

Without me realizing that my body was squeezing like it had no energy at all, my vision darkened and could not see with the light shining. My body fell to the floor because I was unconscious. And I don't know what's happening to me anymore, it's just that I feel that my weak body is being carried by some medical team, and then laid on top of the banker, mattresses that are specifically for patients.

"Mom, can you hear my voice?"

I slowly opened my eyes, then I swept every corner of this room. And when my consciousness had not yet fully recovered, I heard the faint voice of a man greeting me. Then, with my body still weak, I asked the man wearing a doctor's alma mater.

"Doctor? What happened to me, Doc?"

The doctor who looked young also explained and said many things to me. However, he did not discuss what happened to my body. Because at that time I was still in the process of checking with some test equipment that I had to undergo to ascertain what pain I was suffering. And I hope that the pain that goes into my body is just a normal pain from exhaustion.

"Is it still a long time, Doc?"

"Emm .. no ma'am, maybe soon the sisters will give it." Doctor Farhan once again threw a smile at me.

For a moment I was silent with my body still feeling a little weak. However, I somehow felt uneasy and afraid of what Dr. Farhan had learned after seeing my test results later. But I will not stop to remember my Prophet and Allah as my protector. I leave everything that is going to happen about my life ahead of me.

Not long after that someone knocked on the door from outside this room. And Farhan's doctor allowed the man to go inside, and he saw a nurse carrying a piece of paper that I did not know what was inside. After giving the piece of paper to Farhan's doctor, the nurse said goodbye to leave the room. Likewise with doctor Farhan who nodded slowly while thanking the nurse.

"What's that ... my test results, Doc?"

I asked with a self filled with doubt. Even to question the results of the test, my mouth felt stiff. As if it was so hard to just throw it. However, with all my might I will try to stay strong in dealing with it. Facing all the trials that have been destined for me.

"Bu Aisyah, has Bu Aisyah ever felt shortness of breath or a pounding heart before?"

"Or, Doc. But that's how I felt just now, when I walked into your room. Before that I had never experienced what you asked me." I bow my eyes.

"But Ms. Aisyah, in your test results .. there is a big problem that must be addressed immediately." Doctor Farhan looked at me sharply.

"What's the big deal, Doc? Does that mean... I have a disease?"

"Is there a family to contact at this time, Miss Aisyah? Because I have to explain to one of your families." Doctor Farhan looked back at me with a serious look.

"Nothing, Doc. Whenever there is, I strongly ask you not to tell anyone about what I have suffered. And I want to know how bad the disease that entered my body is. Just explain it to me, Doc!"

I ventured to look at Doctor Farhan's face which I should not have done to him. However, what is this force that wants to know about the truth. The real truth, which I must accept freely if at any time death will pick me up suddenly. With a pleading gaze to doctor Farhan, he finally explained what was happening in my body.

"Are you sure, ready to accept my explanation?"

"I'm ready, even very ready to accept whatever happens, Doc. So, please explain to me immediately!"

"Alright Miss Aisyah, I will explain everything to you. In the test results I diagnosed, you are declared to have a history of heart cancer. Where you will find it difficult to breathe while sleeping in a supine position, unconsciousness, dizziness, dizziness and heart palpitations quickly." Clearly doctor Farhan was in a slow tone.

"The doctor wasn't wrong in diagnosing my health, was he? It is impossible if I have a history of the disease. Whereas I don't feel like what you explained earlier, Doc." I shouted in denial of Farhan's doctor's statement.

"I'm sorry, Miss Aisyah. But, that's the truth." Doctor Farhan looked at me with sadness.

I was instantly speechless and stunned when I heard that I had a history of heart cancer. Even my heart felt crumpled and broken into pieces, as if it had been slapped to become a better human being. Should I hide and hide all of this from them? Or do I have to forget what I heard so that everyone doesn't know about my situation? Could there be a life expectancy for me?