Hating Love
Needs to be happy

It's hard to deal with...

It turns out that the love that I had been dreaming about was something that made me hurt this deep.

The love that made me physically decline. Love makes me helpless.

Resisting all the pain of being unreliable, disappointed because of being ignored, hungry for not wanting to burden and not wanting to ask for fear of being scolded.

Letting this wound pierce to the heart.

Resisting the pain of not being trusted and always being blamed.

Different thoughts and frequent debates.

Sometimes I wish good things would happen, but the expected ones never come. Until tired it feels, the heart holds sad for the sake of being the best.

Always succumbing to be considered good but in the end it is still a reason for his pain and departure.

Blamed for what was done, my existence seemed to be a burden.

I hate the love you say so much.

I no longer want what is called love.

I can only hope to leave quietly.

Don't want to go back in a long time.

Want to go also do not want.

There is a mission that has not been done.

There is something that has not been realized.

There is a heart that asks for justice.

There is love that asks for a reply.

There is an unrequited taste.

There I am waiting for your return.

Disappointment is no longer expressed.

Sad no longer wanting to shed tears.

Glad I couldn't laugh either.

All feelings poured out through tears because happiness is no longer useful.

When he's happy maybe my happiness will come too.

It was different when I was happy and she was hurt. I'll be questioned for the reason of his injury. I'll be held accountable for her injuries. I'll be blamed for the wound. I too will be cut down because of the wound.

That's when I'm always wrong in everyone's eyes. I was blamed from all directions. No one defends, no one protects, no one gives the shoulder as a rebuttal and no support.

This is where I thought my existence was a mistake.

My existence is like a burden. Though I have been reminded that all that lives is a burden. But there are many things that I cannot accept, missed from the wounds I have lived, the betrayal I suffered, pitted against the sheep, even made a scapegoat.

Suffer? No. gabe. I'm just disappointed in what happened. I just haven't accepted what I'm dealing with.

The selfishness inside me still has not disappeared and my sadness is still stored in my heart.

My tears have been long, my tears have been hard. There's no feeling I want to express.

Sometimes I just want to cry as hard as possible in the rain.

I don't want people to know that I'm hurt or even hurt.

Here I want to be alone, do not want to care about anyone anymore because most people just want to be cared for but do not want to care.

It's funny, isn't it?!.

Funny because it only wants good things but does not give kindness to others.

Either stupid or too good if I continue to care for others who continue to be indifferent to me.

I continue to learn the best for others but I sometimes forget that I need to be as happy as they are.