Getting Married Due to Misunderstanding
24. Heartbroken

...___________...

When I heard Mama's voice calling my name, my body froze. My tongue feels too. Some questions started to come to my mind. I turned my body towards Mama. I feel like my position right now is not okay. Especially with the condition of the eyes of Mama who has blushed intensely. I'm confused to describe how Mama feels right now. Did Mom just cry? or is your mom angry with me? 

"So what Alesha said is true, Alisha?" mama asked intimidatingly.

"How can you acknowledge your brother as the opponent of your life? Do you also feel that Alesha is the biggest enemy in your life?" the question came out of my mother's mouth. Mama said that with great disappointment. 

"Alisha, please answer!"

"How could you possibly behave like your own brother?"  

"Why can't you answer my question?" mama asked with a trembling tone, her voice also sounded hoarse. I remained silent for quite a while. Finally my mom approached me.

"Alisha, would you please answer my question?" he said with a high tone.

"Yes right, I hate Alesha Adnan so much. I envy her so much, because everything she wants, can be obtained easily. Why didn't Mom ask? Are you jealous of Alesha?" I said with a trembling voice.

"Even if Mama didn't ask that, I would still say it, I was so envious of all that Alesha had. Because Mama, Papa and Kak Hanzal, always privileged Alesha. Even Mama never seemed to exist when I needed the figure of an old man. That's why I hate Alesha so much." I said as if I didn't cry. I said it strictly. Why do I have to hold everything back again, if Mama also knows the truth. 

Why is my current position like being an antagonist, just because I'm jealous of all the injustices that Mama and Papa gave Alesha.

"Did Mama ever see me around Mama? Does Mama know where I am? What Mama remembers, if I too was born from the same womb as Alesha. But Mama never saw me if I existed," obviously I managed to make Mama's mouth silenced. 

"There was one painful moment. When we were still living in Bengkulu, I was still in elementary school. The whole family got together and told me that Alisha was never given breast milk by her mother. Even if only a drop of breast milk. You know what happened after that?" ask me in a low tone while refraining from crying. Mom nodded weakly.

"The news was heard by all the classmates. After that, I was completely bullied. Just because I never got breast milk from my own mother. I don't know what the reason is. But ever since that incident, all my classmates assumed that I wasn't your son, Ma. They always tell me, son of uncertain origin. No one wants to be friends with me,"

"It doesn't happen one day, but two years. Until finally, when we moved to Aceh. That's where I started to have friends back. Friends that can be said to be friends. Not a bully who's posing as a close friend." I clearly. After saying that, Mama didn't say anything more. It was so painful to say something that traumatized me. Mama wiped her tears that managed to wet her cheeks. 

"Alisha, sorry." He said he made my eyes come down hard. Mama rubbed my cheeks that had been soaked by tears with both of her hands. I looked at Mama's face with a cold look. Somehow I was not the least bit moved by his actions. Is my pain too deep? Do I have such a big grudge against Alesha? Why do I look like a bad guy? 

"I'm sorry that I was never there for you." My tears kept flowing, but my mind was empty.

"Alisha, please listen to me! I never paid attention to you. But I can't let Alesha do anything either. From childhood Alesha always depends on me and your Papa. He's her son's been panning. He has also been in and out of hospitals since childhood. That's what makes Mama have to take care of Alesha more than you." Obviously Mama.

"Do I need to be seriously ill first, let Mama pay the same attention to me?" I still look at Mama with a blank look.

"Do I need to be beautiful like Alesha, let Mama take care of me?"

"Do I have to be as smart as Alesha who is able to achieve all the international awards in the academic field, Let Mama not be ashamed to recognize me as Mama's child?"

"Ma, would you please answer?" even though my tears were falling so hard, I asked with my eyes still blank.

"Mama, please tell me, how can Mama pay attention to me and love me, like Mama specializes Alesha? How am I supposed to be, Ma? Please say something, so that this young woman in front of you can get affection from her parents?" my many. My mother has not answered anything.

"If you want only one daughter and one son, why didn't you kill me when I was born. Doesn't that benefit all parties. Rather than you having to be forced to raise a daughter who only troubles you." I said, I felt suddenly my body was limp and somehow I felt my vision start to spin and start to darken. I really want to get nauseous from dizziness. 

I only remembered a little before I was unconscious, I fell to the floor. At that time Mama immediately hugged me with excessive panic. This is the first time that Mom has cared about me.  And at that moment, I just felt what it was like to get a hug from a mother who had given birth to me. Because as I remember, Mama never hugged me. Even from childhood, for many reasons that I do not know.

..._____________...

When I opened my eyes, I felt no stranger to the pungent smell of my sense of smell. It's true, I was in the hospital. I forget, if from morning have not put any food other than water into the stomach. Maybe that's why I ended up in the hospital. My stomach acid must have gone up. Did Mama bring me here? The impossibility that should never have crossed my head.

Slowly I tried to sit down and take a fruit that was in the nightstand next to the bed. I took one unpeeled dragon. There was also a knife. Since I was feeling great hunger, I finally cut the dragon fruit in half and I ate it with a spoon. 

Suddenly I feel restless. I decided to get out of the room. I walked a little far from my room. My steps stopped at the genetic specialist's office. The door of the geneticist's room opened slightly. 

"Why is Mama and Papa there? It looks serious too?" ask me to myself. I stopped for a moment to find out what happened. Mom and Dad were arguing with the doctor.

For a moment I thought. To a layman like me, a geneticist is a bit unfamiliar to our ears. But little do I know, if a geneticist one of his jobs is, uh, one of his, for consultation to conduct DNA tests on patients who want to know from themselves or their families who experience genetic congenital diseases in order to quickly prevent. Or because you want to know your biological child. Which is the correct answer? 

Do both of us have a serious genetic disease? I and Alesha were in the same hospital. I haven't seen Alesha yet. 

"It's hard enough for me to say this to you. We don't actually believe in the DNA results." The Doctor said. 

"What does that mean? Please don't beat around the bush." Said Papa.

"Alesha's DNA test doesn't match your DNA. That means we need a blood donor for Alesha. But it just so happens that the hospital provides the same blood type as the blood type for Alesha." Obviously the doctor the man.

"How could Alesha's DNA test with us not match at all. How can Alesha not be our son. Please check again!" tell Mom to force. 

"Mr Rumaisha, I thought so at first. But after three laboratory tests, the results were the same. Alesha is not your real child."

"That's impossible. I gave birth to Alesha. How can Alesha not be our son." Mama said immediately emotionally. Papa immediately calmed Mama by standing hugging her. 

"Ma, relax!"

"How can I calm down. Alesha is not our son. What are we going to tell Alesha."

"Then what about Alisha's DNA test?"

"DNA Alisha fits you both. Alisha's your real son."

"Alhamdulillah" said Papa. 

"After this incident, I have no face to face with either Alesha or Alisha." Mama tried to calm herself.

"What do you mean talk like that?" Mama just kept quiet for a long time. After they had a long argument and would decide to come out. I immediately ran while carrying the infusan pole. Somehow I could hit a man's nose. Our height is not so far away. My height is just under that guy. As I raised my head, the man grimaced in pain as his nose and my forehead collided with each other unintentionally. 

"Barre? sorry, sorry for not intentionally." The man was silent as he rubbed his nose that was blushing violently. I really feel guilty.

"The road can be slow Alisha. Don't use running events either. Then why the heck run around using an infusion pole all? you are sick, you better be quiet. Not even running around like a kid." He said he was nagging me.

"I'm sorry, I swear by accident." I said I felt guilty.

"Yes, I'm sorry, back to the room again! Please, meet Hanzal now, Hanzal nyariin you just now but you didn't meet. The one wanted was running around here" he said, kicking me out. 

"Yes yes, Doctor Barra. I'm not running around." I said a little annoyed still looking for self-defense. The man just acted flat while shaking his head.

"Keep if not run away what was the name, Alisha Adnan? Crawl or squat again? Don't give me many reasons, now flick back to your room!" He said, it's sadistic that this man with white senelli. I hurried to leave Barra. 

Alesha, how could he not be Mama and Papa's son? What's going on is actually. Then where's my real twin? Is he still alive? If so, my rival will be one more. To deal with Alesha alone my life is always not okay. What's happening today is that Alesha is not the son of my parents. But it seems like Mama will still love Alesha as usual without diminishing a bit. And I'll still be a stranger. But somehow my steps even stepped into Alesha's room. No matter how sorry I am to Alesha, I still feel sorry if something happens to her. 

...___________...

...To be continued...

...Definition, dear but hate/hate but dear?...