I'm Not Your Surga's Angel
13. Nightmares

I see my husband like this it feels very happy, yes despite all that I still have a little fear, the fear that always makes me want to give up where when I keep my husband's self-esteem from the ridicule of people or family, where when I am very concerned, where I always tried to defend my husband but in fact I was wrongly blamed by him and preferred his family, but I'm sure God didn't sleep, Allah is with me so I submit to Allah the good for the future.

sometimes I think what is my fault that I feel like I am not appreciated and considered by his family??

but over and over again I dismissed those thoughts, I tried to think positively and what went through my mind was just my feelings, yes maybe I was too excessive or less mature.

Astarghfirullah...

forgive your servant O Allah, for You are the One Who Rejects the Heart of Man and forgive the one who forgets the Power of MU O Allah....

Dear...

"Dec, um.. What are you thinking?"

so cool and late I was in my thoughts and daydreams, I did not hear Mas Hasan who had repeatedly called me..

"Ah i-iya mas.. sorry mas what's wrong??"

"ehm. mas has finished his bath yuk now we eat first let mas there is energy hehehe"

"dek, answer the question What is it? what are you thinking until you call repeatedly you don't hear?"

"ah i-it's yes.it's not what mas. it's really okay,"

"don't lie deck?"

the investigation is suspicious..

"yeah yeah I'm okay times.."

"seriously? you're not lying anymore?" ask him for his umpteenth time by squinting his eyes.

"i was just thinking, did I fill up? because I feel strange sometimes dizziness suddenly disappears." I said lying

"we'll see the doctor on deck...

may we soon be entrusted by God.."

Aami...

***

during the trip to the hospital I prayed in my heart that my feeling was right that I was again pregnant and hopefully with me pregnant my husband can pay more attention to me and his family can better consider me there.. Aami..

Deck, you end this mas notice often daydreaming, what is it?

you if there is a problem do not keep it yourself, there I deck your husband who is always there for you.

I still did not answer even I did not look at him.

I hope you're always there for me, and unfortunately I can't tell you what's wrong with me.. I'm afraid you blame me again as before, not that I don't believe but that I take care of it more and I keep it to myself..

"Sir.." call him while taking my right hand.

I turned and responded with a smile, "in response that I'm fine."

After arriving at hospital X, Mas Hasan and I went to the registration and after that I walked to the gynecologist room and I and Mas Hasan looked for a seat to wait for their turn to be called.

fifteen minutes passed and now it was my turn to enter the gynecologist's room.

"mother Liza.."

"yes, sus,."

please enter bu your turn is checked

I stepped in with Mas Hasan, and I was told to lie on the bed, open the upper clothes and my stomach gel to make it easier to do USG.

a few seconds later the doctor said with a smile looking at the monitor.

"nah tuh pak buk. alhamdulillah yes, there is already a small bag of peas which means Liza's mother is pregnant. congratulations yes pak buk you will be parents."

"Alhamdulillah.." answered me and Hasan in unison so happy.

"how old is doc?" ask Mas Hasan to doctor Ratna as an obstetrician.

"yes, thank you doctor Doc.."

this I only prescribe vitamins, sir, so that the baby remains healthy, even though the baby is healthy, but it's okay to be healthier.

"aamiin. trimksh doctor," I replied.

"then we excuse you, doctor.thank you again." said Hasan to doctor Ratna my obstetrician.

hasan and I walked out and went to the pharmacy to redeem the prescription from Dr. Ratna,

"Your grandfather is sitting here, let the mas queue to take his vitamins."

"yes, thank you.."

mas Hasan replied with a smile

ten minutes passed..

"yuk deck we go home is done now." he said by showing vitamins for me

"ayo mas.." I replied with a nod and a smile

on the way home I saw Mas Hasan so happy to be seen from earlier he smiled happily, but I only smiled at a glance because I did not disengage from the bottom of my heart I was also very happy.

when I got home I went straight into the room and clean then I laid my body because it felt very tired.

"cappies on deck? if you are tired, just rest on the deck.."

"hmm. yes mas. thank you mas.."

***

It didn't feel like it was getting dark and I just realized I was asleep for too long..

"Astaghfirullah. Why is it dark? and this is why I'm like a sick person when I'm just pregnant not sick."

I got up and stepped into the bathroom and headed to the kitchen because I was hungry..

when I was in the kitchen I was confused what to eat? whereas if I cook again lazy because I am alone at home, yes Mas Hasan after returning from the hospital was directly working because it was only permission for a while.

AHA. eat instant noodles soup eggs like good eggs like. duduhh new ngebayangin aja already ngeces me. hehehe.

I take instant noodles and eggs with some chilies and then I cook water to boil the noodles.

five minutes later the instant noodle soup with eggs is ready.and eemm it feels no match hehe.

after eating and my stomach feels full I go back to the room and sleep, before going to bed I call Mas Hasan, is it still a long time to go home from work?

he said he was on his way home,

so I undo my intention to sleep.I immediately wait for Mas Hasan on the sofa in front of the TV and not long mas Hasan has arrived at home,

I opened the door and greeted Hasan with a smile..

it seems like Hasan is very tired,..

"mas I ready warm water for a bath yes.." afterwards want me to make a warm ginger tea does not mas let tired it disappear??

"hemm.yeah, that's okay thanks deck.."

"yes, I." answered with a smile.

emm. mas later I have to discuss the same mas if you are not tired..

mas Hasan knitted his brows in astonishment,..

what was? what do you want Liza ingredients for?

happy new year 2022 yes brother all hopefully in this year all given health, safety and a lot of nutrition.

yuukkk leave a trail for the author..😊