UNLUCKY
Ch.1 - Felix
At birth, I was unwanted...
And something unwanted must of course be thrown away.
Even I'm worse than gum. My parents should have before throwing me away, should have used me first, at least...
But the people at the Orphanage always instilled this into us, "You were not abandoned by your parents, but simply left out. They must have their own reasons why they should do that."
My ears were ringing at the nonsense I had memorized, "Adults are those who know what is good and what is bad, and what is bad, when they speak or act, they have the best control possible."
"Omong empty!" I said slowly.
"Felix, don't say that" said Ms. Panti to me, of course in a soft voice and not forgetting her smiling facial expression.
"If it wasn't the bread I was holding, I would have thrown it in his face, but I was hungry and if I had acted as I wanted, I would have been punished and couldn't have breakfast" I said.
"The kids here are unlucky and unlucky kids," at least.
I felt the look in the eyes of all those in this room who felt the same way as me.
"If you are unlucky, you will not be born into this world and know what if you are unlucky and have not lived your life properly. You're only 10 years old Felix, to say you're unlucky is still too soon. Tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, you'll laugh at those words."
***
Hearing my name being called has pissed me off, Felix which means lucky.
Don't tell me I'm naughty let alone say I'm childish, age is not the size of someone who has grown up and I who have lived 10 years could have known more than 20 years.
I'm not arrogant, if that's your thinking. Hah, arrogant after all what can I be arrogant about.
"Here I am, Felix, a 10-year-old boy living in Helianthus Orphanage... NO LUCK!"
That's how I introduced myself.
***
Panti's mother advised me not to go to public school because of my bad attitude, "Know what they are" I said, "Are they psychiatrists who can diagnose me mentally like I'm determining lunch."
"I told you I was just unlucky, that's all. Why are they so painstakingly thinking of finding a solution so that I'm behaving well."
"Hi Felix"
"...."
"You remember me, right? i'm..."
"Basic fool, of course remember... You're Dea from grade 2-6 we were once a class time in grade 1. The way you introduce yourself is too pleasant-natured, boring and a waste of time."
"I'm sorry, I'm just afraid you forgot."
"forget? every time you meet, you always say the same thing, like the book I've read is over 10x."
"At least you remember I greeted you 10x."
"Why are you smiling?!"
"Will anyone smile because they are sad?"
"Of course there is, hahh. What do you want?"
"Is there any reason to say hello to a friend?"
"Of course I should! And since when are you my friend?!"
"What to be friends with you do I have to ask permission first?"
"No need..."
"Kan, there's no need... Haha"
"Yes, there's no need. Why ask for something that won't be given."
Felix leaves Dea.
***
If only we could choose not to be born but the right to choose was denied to us.
We can only choose after birth, because the right to choose exists only for those who live. Every moment of life is a choice.
Suppose I could choose to be born as Dea, the daughter of the school owner. I will also greet the annoying me cheerfully. But I was born as I was accosted by those who were lucky so don't blame me if I say hello back rudely, because I was born as I so want to how else...
Don't expect me to apologize, at least it's a right to be me. My right to thank has been seized and controlled by the Mothers of the Home who forced us to thank the donors.
"This boy is so handsome" said one donor.
"Name Felix... Ma'am," replied Ms. Panti.
"Even to answer if I should be represented. Introduce my name Felix," I said flatly
Mother Panti looked at me in shock, "She's not very good at socializing Mom."
Start telling my story, know what he is about me. I just don't know myself.
***
A cold night, even with blankets and those of us sleeping together, does not cause warmth.
"Sister Felix, I'm cold."
"I don't care!"
"Can I hug you?"
I woke up and didn't forget to take my blanket and pillow out. I began to lie down on the chair in the garden.
It turned out that the cold could take away my pride, it was not strong.I walked about to enter the room again but a piece of wood was thrown in front of me as I walked while looking down.
When I lifted my head, my coldness disappeared with such intense heat that it burned the blanket I was wearing and soon my consciousness was gone. My last memory was when a fragment of the building wall would land on my face and I would block it with my hand. I saw my hands bleed, "Why is my blood black?" fortunately, my consciousness was gone before I felt the pain.
"Helianthus Orphanage burned to the ground killing dozens of children and the Home Office, the Guardian reported, only 1 child and 2 Kitchen Officers are now being treated at a nearby Hospital while the others die while they are fast asleep."
The loud sound of the tv woke me up, wanting me to throw it in silence but the pain stopped me.
"He's awake!" said an uncle in uniform.
They came and surrounded my bed. Fortunately, there was a nurse who stopped them and told them to leave the room, "It's a pain to see them standing around me like that."
"Hello, what's your name?"
"Felix!"
"Halo Felix, my name is Sister Luna. How's your wound, does it hurt?"
"Huhhh!" I woke up and started to remember everything that happened, I looked at my wrapped hands and I felt my forehead hurt so much. My throat was narrow, it was hard to breathe and my sweat was pouring out. My body felt ice-filled, it was cold and I lost consciousness again.
When I woke up uncle in uniform was increasing in number around me, "Truly annoying," I said inwardly.
"Hello son, how are you doing?"
I don't know why I can't move my mouth. Wanted me to answer in annoyance, "Of course it's not good!" but I can't open my mouth.
I wanted to scream but could not, I unconsciously let out tears.
"Don't cry, son!"
Who is crying? sure enough, I only let out tears but still I couldn't get the word out.
***
The Orphanage fire is endless news so talk. Sometimes I get jealous of how fast they talk. The way they spoke that there was no comma point was speeding so fast. Like a train, that's how fast gossip spreads.
Now I live in Arbor orphanage and undergo psychological testing every week and counseling every 2 weeks.
Doctor Mari, although her voice sounded annoying but she was the only one who did not look at me with a strange look.
For a month there were those who looked at me with pity and those who looked at me were afraid and avoided me.
A lot of rumors are going around that the perpetrator who set the orphanage on fire could have been me.
I told you long ago I was not a bad boy.
Although the housewives and other children are so annoying but the housewives are still those who took care of me since childhood and the orphanage children even though they always bother me they always keep the side dishes for me if I am late come to eat.
They suck but they don't suck until I have to burn down the parlour, let alone hurt it.
Doctor Mari, unlike everyone else in general who sucks by asking questions and talking pleasantries.
He didn't even notice me and just looked out the window sipping his steamy tea.
When I started writing on paper. He began to look at me,
"Am I not going to be able to talk anymore?" write me.
"That question is the only one you can answer!"
"So I can talk normally again?"
"Of course."
"But why can't I do it? as hard as I can't do it..."
"Don't blame your mouth for not being able to speak but ask your heart if it's ready to talk?"
Writing to talk should be annoying but I'm strangely comfortable.
The Arbor Orphanage is a very large Orphanage in contrast to the Helianthus Orphanage which used to be small. Felix has his own room. Although Doctor Mari suggested that he share a room with other children to be able to stimulate to talk but Felix did not want a roommate.
***
Tok.
Felix woke up to open the door.
"I brought you some food, because I didn't see you in the dining room."
By far the most disturbing Felix is Luna. Right, she's the nurse who handled Felix's time at the hospital.
He used to be an orphanage kid here but on weekends he always came to help with the job at the orphanage.
Felix felt a rope hanging a book around his neck to write but it turned out that he was loose at the table.
"So, it's hard to talk and write first."
"This brother really knows how to irritate people" Felix said in his heart.
As Felix wanted to grab his food tray, Luna lifted him up.
"How about eating it in the garden while watching your friends play ball must make the food more delicious..."
Felix stomped on Luna's sneakers that were about to spill food and finally closed the door of her room.
"Of course you're Princess Rapunzel" cried Luna from outside.
Felix then opened the door and hit the tray until the food fell and closed the door again.
"Keep that until your hair is long and so the shampoo ad," not yet finished Luna's sentence, Felix opened the door by carrying a clothes hanger in his hand.
Seeing that Luna chuckled, "I'm just kidding, want me to get some more food?"
***
2 Months have passed since the fire broke out and Felix has not spoken.
According to the 2 Kitchen Officers who survived the home, they from the market buy food for breakfast and when they get to the front of the house to open the car door a big explosion directly hit the car and made the car thrown.
The police investigation revealed that the fire was set off by someone. Fuel oil has been found in all corners of the building, most of the basic materials are wood and an expensive match is blue with the inscription 'Goddess'. But the owner of the match could not be found even if it was found it could not prove that he was the culprit.
Kitchen workers Adney and Alvina suffered multiple burns. Even a miracle they survived.
Felix also left a burn scar on his wrist and on the forehead near his hair.
"Luckily you're handsome, otherwise you'll look like a thug with that scar" Luna sneered.
Felix just breathed hard... "I've guessed why today there's something strange," apparently because Luna hasn't pricked her today.
During this time Felix never complained for fear of being considered like a child but he wrote with large letters shown to Doctor Mari, "PLEASE KEEP ME AWAY FROM LUNA THAT SUCKS!"
Doctor Mari ignored him and started walking to the park. Felix ran after her and showed her the writing again but ignored it again, Doctor Mari just exhaled a rough breath and opened the candy to eat and walked again.
Felix was confused, he ran as hard as he could but why could not match the steps of Doctor Mari who had long legs. Until finally Felix opened the sheet again to write but instead hit Doctor Mari, "Aw..."
"Hemmm. funny, you hit you in pain. Don't cosplay be a victim!"
As Felix was about to write, Doctor Mari threw Felix's pen into a field where children were playing ball in it.
Felix growled and looked at Doctor Mari hatefully but Doctor Mari casually just sat down while sucking on her candy.
Felix wanted to leave Doctor Mari but then he stopped the moment,
"I've told everyone at the parlour not to give you stationery and for an orphanage in the middle of a forest like this, it wouldn't sell you a pen or anything."
For the first time Felix smiled. Not smiling because of happiness but because it is not out of thought, like the whole world joined wants to work on it.
Until there was no other way but to go to the field and take the pen.
While in the middle of the field and picking up the questioner, he felt noticed by everyone.
"Can the ball pass?"
Turns out the ball was beside him, Felix also kicked the ball to the child who asked earlier and passed it to another and then approached Felix.
"Would your kick be good too, wanna play? you can get on my team!"
Felix nodded.
"My name is Cain" he patted Felix on the back and started running again after the ball.
"In the end he was also just a child, too," Doctor Mari said with a smile and exhaled in annoyance as she reached into her pocket and the candy was up.
***
Since then Cain and Felix often play ball together although Felix still does not want to talk sometimes makes Cain regret having to wait for the answer to his question if written, which if written, Felix had only one word and it took a long time.
"It seems like it's time for you to talk again" Cain said as he exhaled.
Soon there was smoke coming out of the windows of the building. Felix who saw that instantly trembled and sat down while covering his face.
The confused Cain asked, too,
"Felix, what's wrong with you?"
"QUICK RUN FROM HERE!!!" felix shouted loudly.
Finally after 3 months Felix spoke again.
...-CONNECT-...
